Thursday, January 22, 2009

Stockpiling cash-revisited

As you know, dear readers, in addition to being an expert on surviving the end of the world, I also bide my time as a bartender, because I need money to build up my supplies for 2012. Also, I am nosy by nature and one can learn many things while simply pretending to be cleaning.

One story I would like to relate occurred a couple weeks ago and is directly related to the notion of stockpiling money in the event of a national disaster. What happened is this:

Four gentlemen (dentists, by trade) came to my bar and commenced eating our fine food and drinking our delicious beverages. Naturally, their conversation turned to the end of the world, as that is a topic on everyone's minds. After discussing possible scenarios (bank crash, food shortages, etc.) one of the dentists brought up the fact that he has $5,000 cash in his house stockpiled for the end times. Not to be outdone, the other three dentists declared that they each had between $5,000 and $10,000 in cash hidden in their houses. Luckily, they had a sympathetic party overhearing their bragging, for I am generally for people preparing for the end times. However, they were stupid for discussing it aloud in a public place because what if I had been a bad guy? I would definitely have texted my minions to follow them home and rob each and every one of them. Especially because they only tipped 10%. Generally, don't talk about how much money you have if you are not going to tip properly. Of course, that is how people get so much money--by not sharing it.

Now you know my views on stockpiling cash. I think it is stupid because you can't eat money and when it comes right down to it, I would rather have rice and potatoes than $5,000. Luckily, Social Darwinism dictates that those smart enough to stockpile food will survive while those only hoarding cash will not.

1 comment:

Dogmama said...

You crack me up Happy Yellow!!!